Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Standing Tall... the need of the hour...

Not everything in my life is going on as it should be... infact.. to put it the otherway around.. there is hardly anything which is positive right now...

First up... My confirmation in my job has gotten delayed by 3 months ... ( which is a blessing in disguise... as i am looking for a change).. but it does leave a bad bad taste as to what wrong i am doing at my job... maybe an introspection is round the corner.

Secondly, things are not going too well with A .. yeah.. what started out to be a wonderful friendship and very very special one at that is slowly withering away.. is grasping out of my reach.. its so strange to see that now when we talk we hardly have anything to discuss.. or even carry out general conversations.. She is supposed to be my best friend.. but now it all seems like a distant memory.. when i think of the reason behind it.. its all too obvious..

yes.. i fell for my best friend.. besotted is the right word... and i dont regret it .. not one bit.. bcoz probably no-one in this world can tell me that it is wrong to fall in love.. yeah.. i stayed put in fantasyland when the writing was on the wall for me to see..

but i dont blame you for anything A, i understand ( i dont have a choice .. frankly!).. i want my buddy back.. and that can only happen when both want it that way...

and probably that is why i need to stand up to this... face it head on.. and move on... another chapter closes... I GIVE UP..

6 comments:

annie said...

Hiya...Ey that's kinda sad on her part to do that.The starting point of love is frndhip and i dont see u rong here..after all its natural for u to fall for anyone.I can relate to her as well..she mus b tryin to maintain some distance now..give her time..she will eventually realise the value of frdship atleast.

Rahul... in City of Dreamz said...

@Annie: She does realise the value of the friendship... definately.. but the bridges are broken so bad that right now its all about disaster control.. and yes.. i am giving her time..

MiNi said...

Its so very normal to fall for some-one close to your heart. rather than a foolish 'luv @ first sight'.
I have been going through the same.. One question that has been baffling me since a yore..
you think if she gets back to you, you be able to take a step back and treat her as a friend again?

Rahul... in City of Dreamz said...

@Mini: thats exactly whats happening to me.. and trust me taking that step backwards is the hardest thing.. beacuse its difficult to console your heart.. it aches every single time i talk to her ...

But then i think of all those precious times i spent with her.. and then i realize that there is no way that i am gonna let the friendship drift...

but yes.. the despite our best efforts.. the awkwardness remains..

downright crazyyyy!!!!!!!!!! said...

falling 4 sum1 u really noe , s understood. its a pity dat she din feel de same.
but abt continuing de friendship...
i tried doing dat wit ma frnd. but no...he cldnt c me just as a frnd anymore.
becam soo hsterical dat i hd no clue hw i ws supposd 2 handle him. anyweys v wern de best f buddys & ofcourse it took a toll n ur relation.

Rahul... in City of Dreamz said...

@DC: yeah! thats exactly how i am feeling these days. the friendship seems to have gone for a toss..

but then i am not the only one in it right? The effort to salvage the ruins should come from both the parties..